Monday, February 2, 2009

Share Your Love - Don't Be Selfish

For the first time in my life, I was finally able to share my deepest feelings and thoughts with someone that I loved. What a relief! I told him exactly how I felt, how I loved him, and to what depth. In the past pride would grab a hold of my mind and prevent me from sharing. I would get thoughts like “he will think you are weak”, “he will think you are stupid, silly”, “he will just use you”, “you will feel inferior”, “he won’t like you anymore”. Well, let me tell you – God has transformed me SO much that I was able to put all those thoughts aside and ‘spill my beans’! I have no regrets. I must confess, I do have moments of thoughts trying to get in to tell me that I shouldn't have done it, but I stay focused on the why I did it to begin with and it helps me slap those thoughts right out of my mind.

Why I did it? Well, God nudged my heart to tell him that I loved him and how deep my feelings were. I did not do it for me. I did it all for him. God wanted him to know how much someone in this world (me in this case) loved him. That he is special. He can be loved. He is of value to many in this world. He did make an impact in someone’s life. It was important that I share that with him even though I ran the chance of not being accepted and being rejected.

Unfortunately, I was rejected. He walked away. He heard what he needed and turned his back. I don’t think he rejected my love for him; he rejected the love of God that flowed through me to him because it was all God that was working through me. I know that it was only through the Grace of God that I was able to voice all my deepest feelings for him straight to him – in person, face to face! That was a big step for me!!! But for some reason God needed him to know my feelings for him. Now it is up to him to do what he needs to with that information. That is between him and God. I pray that one day he will find God and get to know God because God loved him so much that God gave me the strength and courage to share my heart with him.

I can sit here and say “what about me?” But I have learned that life is NOT about me. It is about giving and serving others. This is the true purpose in life. I am full of joy and happiness now because I was able to share my love with someone. I was able to provide someone with one of the greatest gifts in life – knowing that you are loved!

Thank you Lord for giving me the courage and the strength to share love openly, honestly, and whole heartedly. Please Lord, continue to help me battle the wicked thoughts in my mind concerning his rejection and any future rejection. Thank you Lord for your daily reminders of how much you love me and how all I need is YOU Lord. Lord I ask that you please give those that read this, the strength and courage to share their love. Give them the wisdom to know that by sharing our love we encourage others and that is a reward. Thank you Lord. In Jesus' name. AMEN.

2 comments:

Glenia & her Crew said...

WOW, sis that is so BIG! I can defenetly say to you that the right things arent always the easiest things to do in life cus that was a hard one, I know. Thank the Lord that he is with you and can be there to let you know that what you did was not for your benefit, but for another person who needed to know that he is worthy of being loved too. Especially by a woman of faith such as yourself, that has God's love to share.
Love you keep pressing on!

Gloria Rodriguez said...

Liza, thank you so much for allowing us to take a deeper look into your heart. And I'm super excited that God gives you that peace to share it uncensored. Although our desire for others (especially the ones we love) to hear what were saying (and truly get it) - God desires so much more for them, and like you've said to me, it's in His timing, not ours. It's funny how although were at different places in our walk with God, were experiencing the same "obstacles". Thanks for "spilling your beans" sister. They will NOT return void!